How very Downton Abbey of me. Anyway, the baby is fine, and we’re sleep deprived, so this will be short. I’ll start writing it all down, somehow.
So I had to have the planned C-section, and as far as that stuff goes, it was fine. Everyone was friendly and relaxed, and it was surreal. I watched J’s face when they pulled L out of me, since they had the medical curtain up and I couldn’t see the birth. (This was ok; I didn’t want to see my uterus up close and personal.) Anyway.
Then I was in the recovery area, and the last thing I remember was J standing next to me, holding L, and telling me to breathe deeply… the docs were pushing on my uterus and it wasn’t contracting. I was hemorrhaging, and there was a lot of blood, apparently.
Three transfusions later, and more anesthesia, I woke up as they wheeled me into a private room in Labor and Delivery.
We were there the first 2 nights, and that was rough… mostly because it’s really hard to sleep when you’re convinced your newborn is going to die (for no reason) and she won’t sleep on her back in a bassinet, and the nurses are intimidating and you don’t want them to take your newborn and put her in nursery somewhere and and and…
But things are ok now. It’s been 2 1/2 weeks. I just wish breastfeeding wasn’t so freaking HARD. the goal is to have her feed in 20 or 30 minutes. Ha. Yeah right. She usually stops after 2 or 3 hours. She doesn’t really STOP feeding. I just get tired or sore or have to pee, so I break the latch. She feeds really slowly. Been to the lactation consultant 3 times. Fun times!